Why not just have fun and not get emotionally connected?


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AuthorMessageTime
Kitia
Why not just have fun and not get emotionally connected?
2018-03-05
Hello to whoever decided to actually read this.
I just need some advice and here seems to be the right place to get it.
I have three best friends and I love them so much, but one of them I have told I didn't want to hear anything about her relationships because I found the topic to be weird, she understands, but I feel like we are now more distant.
To the topic of relationships I haven't 'dated' anyone since...like....sixth grade because I feel like doing that is and awkward situation to put yourself in. I've tried to talk to people, then broke it off right after because I felt weird.
I have never seen the point in dating someone. Why not just have fun and not get emotionally connected?
Z
2018-03-11
23:19
It is a fact that emotions distort rationale and constitute a great threat to personal balance. Emotions are for the weak.
As for dating, gals are unbalanced and they have frivolous demands as they consider themselves potential wives. One way is to manipulate them by treating them as if they were wives until you fulfill your purpose. The other way is to treat them as if they were moms, which inverts the roles. This way you manipulate them effectively using their emotions. Although they are very prone to being driven to adopt the mentality you want, when you ask them out they get confused and feel awkward like you.
Possible reasons are: They wouldn't date their kids, they take their role seriously and they don't want to have fun with their kids, they are subject to stereotypes, they don't know want they want, they feel scared or deceived.

So you see a case, where emotional connection is fully established, however, dating and having just fun doesn't occur.

You need to use more advanced techniques so that you both achieve the means, emotional connection, and you get the result of manipulation. In theory, the best practice in such a case is to cause ambivalence to moms. That is, you both connect with them emotionally as a kid and as a possible husband so that they get confused and you have the benefits from the mom and the control of the husband. You drive them emotionally as a kid and when it comes to dating, you treat them as if you were a possible husband. Surprise attack is an effective method. Besides women don't know what they want and they will let you decide. Once you get the date, you will treat them again as if you were their kid. Then there is not going back for moms, since the vast majority of them are narcissists and consider taking back their decision is an immature decision. There are definitely other successful practices to emotionally manipulate moms as well, and get the date, with or without the emotional connection. It must depend on the case. They should not understand that they are being manipulated in any case and if they suspect being tricked, then you should not change behavior or give signs of guilt.

I don't know if my advice fits your case, as you are a female, but I don't care as well.

DraScuS
2018-04-17
11:01
Alexi didn't cause any significant problems in my life(Probably because I'm only 15, and haven't got into any relationships yet). For me, the most bothering thing is that my friends and family members seemed to be confused by my symptoms, therefore sometimes humiliates me as "showing a numb face intentionally". I agree on the statement that emotional connections are not needed, but I would try to maintain connections that already existed though.
bpaull
2018-05-15
16:44
For the vast majority of people you meet emotions are very important. Much like eating and sleeping is to you emotions are to them. They can and often do die if their emotional needs are not met.

By telling your friend not to talk about their relationship, to them, you have declared you no longer being interested in their well being.

I know it seems ridiculous but I have spent much time observing them as possible and that seems to be the closet analogy I can draw.

As for relationships, they are to say the least challenging. If you do not feel drawn to them, do not let yourself be drawn into them. It will be beneficial for you and likely the people who would be interested in a relationship with you to avoid it all together.


ALEXITHYMIA .us .org .com .info Terms/Impressum [13:51:50]:UID:
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Alexithymia - emotional blindness - is a personal trait which affects roughly 10% of the population.

Alexithymia describes the difficulty of people to perceive and describe emotions of others and themselves. Most persons concerned are not aware about this deficit and usually they are just recognizing it in contact with others, especially close friends, within their family or their partner.

These pages should deliver additional information about Alexithymia and offer information for affected persons, relatives and generally interested people.