ALEXITHYMIA
Emotional Blindness

    Topic: My boyfriend has alexithymia

    English Alexithymia Forum > Personal Experience

    My boyfriend has alexithymia
    17.01.2016 by aaronnk

    Hey, my boyfriend has been very distanced and I was talking to him about it for a few times. So yesterday he finally told me what's wrong. We are in a long distance relationship since 1 year now and he never told me before. So he told me he has anxiety attacks and can't really feel emotions. Also he doesn't love me. He tried to love me and thought it would come with time but it didn't came yet. And that he wants me to be happy and not hurt. Now I don't know how to react. I broke up yesterday but told him i'm going to support him in any way. And that I will do my best to help him. So my actual question is if it's possible that he can learn to love me. We are both 17 and going to turn 18 this year. Do you think that there is any chance for me that he can learn to love me because I don't think that I could stand being in a relationship with someone who doesn't love me.
    And is there any treatment that he can learn emotions? I'm also not 100% sure if it is alexi. He told me he has clinical depressions and blocks his emotions such as sadness. I love him so much and i'm not willing to give him up this easy. I just want a realistic answer.

    Re: My boyfriend has alexithymia
    17.01.2016 by Artfunkel

    Alexithymia isn't itself an illness, it's a personality trait. In some people it's permanent but for others it's a symptom of another issue...such as clinical depression. Once that is sorted (easier said than done, of course) the rest is very likely to follow. Good luck!

    You cannot "learn" to love someone or expect them to "learn" to love you....
    17.01.2016 by DXS

    Believe me, I have dealt with this my entire life! Don't stay with him because you feel sorry for him. You have to decide if you can live with status quo.

    Thank you for your answers
    17.01.2016 by aaronnk

    It is really hard for me. I love him from the deepest of my soul thats why I am so sorry for him. I want him to feel the same. it doesnt even have to be that he loves me I just want him to feel love. I told him to go to a psychologist and he told me he wants to do that too. I just hope that it is just a symptom of another issue like Artfunkel said.

    Thank you for your answers
    17.01.2016 by aaronnk

    It is really hard for me. I love him from the deepest of my soul thats why I am so sorry for him. I want him to feel the same. it doesnt even have to be that he loves me I just want him to feel love. I told him to go to a psychologist and he told me he wants to do that too. I just hope that it is just a symptom of another issue like Artfunkel said.

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