Topic: "Emotional blindness"

“….even if I read them I will not be able to understand them as I do not have emotions or imagination.”

You answered your own question: Lack of emotions = lack of imagination = lack of understanding

This lack of emotions is putting some limits on the capacity/ability to imagine and understand.

For a rational, thinking person seeking understanding...lack of emotions can at times be a hurdle.

Note: Having emotions does not necessarily mean acting on them. One can choose to detach himself from the effect of the emotions yet still be able to analyze them. Emotions can be used to gain deeper understanding of issues.

I used to play chess, which requires imagination, but not emotions. I used to be a maintenance programmer, which requires you to get into the thought processes of the original programmer; another example of imagination. I lack spontaneous imagination (I don't daydream, or dream), but I still have (controlled) imagination.

Hi Dave,

Thank you for your input. I do not claim to be an expert in the topic…I am learning even through this interaction.

Playing chess or maintenance programming…in my opinion requires ability of “simulation” rather than “imagination”.

Simulation is based on set parameters (based on established logic) whereas imagination has the power to defy established logic and create new definitions of parameters (create new logic). Take the example of mathematics: History is filled with mathematicians who were faced with mathematical problems that could not be solved by conventional methods of their time; so in order to solve those problems they created (through imagination) novel concepts (imaginary numbers, etc.). Those novel concepts of the past are the acknowledged and accepted rules of today (i.e. have become conventional methods/ set parameters)...and can be used in today's simulations.

Sophisticated computers can make simulations but they cannot imagine. Is emotion the missing element?

The effects is that people don't understand you. My mom could not figure me out. She couldn't figure out why I wouldn't say or do or react the same way she would. She kept trying to "Tell me how to feel." I found out later that her own mom "told her how to feel." This is considered emotional abuse. Mom didn't like me feeling DIFFERENTLY than she did. Or not having feelings when she did. Or me HAVING feelings when she did not.

My complaint is about the effect on other people.

But to me, the alexithymia thing makes you more rationale.

"This lack of emotions is putting some limits on the capacity/ability to imagine and understand."
Imagine and understand what? Other people? People drawing easily conclusions about other people become annoying and often hilarious due to their arbitrary opinions driven by emotions.

Social issues/politics? Dictatorships such as the Nazis rose up due to the emotions of people.

Organic issues? For example, from day to day my turds' sizes differ. Apart from the food quantity, I cannot think of another justifying this fact. If had emotions, would I be able to understand and predict my turds' sizes?

"I used to be a maintenance programmer, which requires you to get into the thought processes of the original programmer; another example of imagination"

This might require skills or knowledge.

"The effects is that people don't understand you."

People having emotions also complain about these and if they have a lot of emotions, they often commit suicide.

"But to me, the alexithymia thing makes you more rationale."

So why alexithymia is bad?


No offense, I think people "suffering" from alexithymia have a lot of emotions, because they are concerned about nonsense such as the impact of alexithymia on their life.

Dear ABC,
No need to get into and trying to understand issues that don’t concern you.
Understanding yourself and issues related to you, is sufficient.
What does it mean? Basically know yourself (both internally and externally) and the factors that can cause harm to you (both internally and externally). Then apply logic to live in healthy mutualism with your environment.

Can you apply logic to life without emotions?

Is life logical? Is nature logical? Is biology logical?
Yes, with sufficient data on all of the variables concerned, we would be able to “see” the pure logic in everything. We can explain every abnormality as a logical consequence of change/deficit/addition of some variable over x period of time…provided we have the data on all the relevant variables concerned.

Since life has to be lived in real-time, you do not have access to all the sufficient data on all of the concerned variables on living a full life. You can try and make a simulation model based on your previous life experiences; it might work for some things. However, in the past you went from infancy to childhood to puberty to adulthood…in the future you will be going from adulthood to old-age.

Anyway, insufficient data can cause faulty logic. The more well-informed you are, the better more logical decisions you will be able to make.

Information (data) from your internal and external environment is picked up and processed faster (and hence more abundantly) though emotions than intellect. When you combine data from both sources you will gain more data than by only using one source. However, you will still miss out on much. You could complement to some extent by tapping into other’s experiences through literature. There is benefit in seeking advice. (Note: emotional intelligence facilitates fruitful interaction with others)

Example. You feel sad. You look at the data in front of you and check for the factors that have in the past triggered this feeling in you. You don’t find any correlation with the present. You tap into the experience of those around you to make sure you haven’t missed anything. They don’t find anything either. The next logical step is go to the doctor. Doctor advices tests. Tests confirm that you have abnormally low levels of a vital neurotransmitter (important in many bodily/brain functions). You supplement through diet/medication. Problem resolved. Without the ‘sad’ emotion there was no problem, no understanding of something being wrong.

Emotions, if YOU put them under the control of intellect, can bring understanding to life issues. Now you can even apply logic to these issues.

Emotions, if YOU put them over intellect, can create faulty logic/override logic. This leads to the negative examples that you mentioned. Note: even emotionless decisions made on wrong or insufficient data can cause faulty logic.

I agree with you on many of your sentences, but let me highlight some points.

Decisions of normal people are driven by emotions as the definition of alexithymia describes. Other people may set their own priorities determined by their needs, their instincts, morality, law, rationale and whatever for fulfilling a purpose. They make their decisions according to their priorities=needs and to a method of choice. The priorities = needs are not black or white, but a mix of various factors. Hence, making choices or decisions relying only on emotions is selfish, as it means that you exclude other factors and the likelihood of your making mistakes from your life. It also shows that you are arrogant, because relying only on your emotions means that you believe that you are somehow emotionally genius and you ignore knowledge/law/morality, which are the results of the labor of other people.

I personally do not exclude emotions from being a factor but I do not find a reason explaining their importance. For example, a good deed could be done due to being moved or due to moral laws. Once the good deed is done, what's the difference? Think also that some people without being mentally sick are satisfied when they talk nonsense, throw stones into the sea, unjustifiably change their mind, take extreme actions without a reason, not to mention illegal actions. Things, which are obviously driven by emotions, that do not make sense and may be harmful to them and to the society. So you can consider emotions a deficit.

"When you combine data from both sources you will gain more data than by only using one source."

Ok your five senses constitute the one source. The other source is the sixth sense or the emotional eyesight? It sounds like a science fiction concept or supernatural force. So if it is so important that it can be considered an extra source of sensing, God bless those having the sixth sense. But literally speaking, it must be overestimated, because nobody can exactly the incomparable advantage of emotions.As far as I know there is not even a clear definition of emotions.

"Anyway, insufficient data can cause faulty logic"

It is not only a matter of sufficient but also a matter of data management. The thing is that you can control real data relying on rationale and logical practices, which you can apply just like an algorithm, because real data is real. I cannot think of a way of controlling your emotions apart from an empirical way, because they cannot even be defined, let alone control them with logical practices. It is like trying to capture the air with your hands. Even if you capture it, you cannot sense, you do not understand what happened.


"No need to get into and trying to understand issues that don’t concern you"

This is against the principle of/ need for knowledge and against your own statements. How will you get more data if you do not learn more?

"Without the ‘sad’ emotion there was no problem, no understanding of something being wrong."

Telling lies to yourself or pretending is worse than or the same with telling lies to other people.This is bad advice. Self-criticism always helps you become a better person.

"Emotional intelligence facilitates fruitful interaction with others"

Not always. You defined emotional intelligence as the ultimate skill to understand each other. For example, one does not have emotions and a woman having emotions (as the stereotype dictates) is very beautiful. The guy just wants a kiss and a hug from the woman to confirm that the woman somehow likes him. The woman does not understand, so the guy is forced to pretend that he has emotions acting like a fool. The woman perceives the guy's acting as aiming at having sex with her. Hence she backs off and she is possibly offended. According to the definition of emotional intelligence you gave, the emotionally blind or stupid is the person having emotions.

Hi ABC,

Some clarifications and comments:
1. No need to get into and trying to understand issues that don’t concern you

This was in response to what you had said earlier:
… understand what? Other people? People drawing easily conclusions about other people become annoying and often hilarious due to their arbitrary opinions driven by emotions.

Social issues/politics? Dictatorships such as the Nazis rose up due to the emotions of people.

Organic issues? For example, from day to day my turds' sizes differ. Apart from the food quantity, I cannot think of another justifying this fact. If had emotions, would I be able to understand and predict my turds' sizes?

2. This is against the principle of/ need for knowledge and against your own statements. How will you get more data if you do not learn more?

No contradiction in my statements. I always try to distinguish between beneficial and non-beneficial knowledge. I proactively seek the former and try to avoid the latter.

3. "Without the ‘sad’ emotion there was no problem, no understanding of something being wrong."

Telling lies to yourself or pretending is worse than or the same with telling lies to other people.This is bad advice. Self-criticism always helps you become a better person.

????? No advice was given. Please re-read in context: the sad emotion functioned as a stimulus to trigger the understanding that something was wrong. Without the stimulus there was no reason to investigate and understand that there was a problem.

Agree: Telling lies to yourself and others is wrong.
Agree: justified self-criticism helps to become a better person.

4. "Emotional intelligence facilitates fruitful interaction with others"

Not always.

True it does not guarantee

5. Ok your five senses constitute the one source.

Good point. I did not look it from that angle…but very much true.

6. Things, which are obviously driven by emotions, that do not make sense and may be harmful to them and to the society. So you can consider emotions a deficit.

Many thoughts that human have do not make sense and may be harmful to the society; does that mean that all thoughts that humans have should be considered deficits?

7. For example, a good deed could be done due to being moved or due to moral laws. Once the good deed is done, what's the difference?

Intention behind the action is very important. It is a difference that the conscience understands.

8. Let me quote two sentences from a genetics article:
People who are culturally Deaf have a positive attitude toward being deaf. Typically, they do not wish to be treated or cured of their deafness and may feel threatened that genetic technology could reduce the numbers of deaf people being born.

Hi ABC,

Some clarifications and comments:
1.
No need to get into and trying to understand issues that don’t concern you


This was in response to what you had said earlier:
… understand what? Other people? People drawing easily conclusions about other people become annoying and often hilarious due to their arbitrary opinions driven by emotions.

Social issues/politics? Dictatorships such as the Nazis rose up due to the emotions of people.

Organic issues? For example, from day to day my turds' sizes differ. Apart from the food quantity, I cannot think of another justifying this fact. If had emotions, would I be able to understand and predict my turds' sizes?


2.
This is against the principle of/ need for knowledge and against your own statements. How will you get more data if you do not learn more?


No contradiction in my statements. I always try to distinguish between beneficial and non-beneficial knowledge. I proactively seek the former and try to avoid the latter.

3.
"Without the ‘sad’ emotion there was no problem, no understanding of something being wrong."

Telling lies to yourself or pretending is worse than or the same with telling lies to other people.This is bad advice. Self-criticism always helps you become a better person.


????? No advice was given. Please re-read in context: the sad emotion functioned as a stimulus to trigger the understanding that something was wrong. Without the stimulus there was no reason to investigate and understand that there was a problem.

Agree: Telling lies to yourself and others is wrong.
Agree: justified self-criticism helps to become a better person.

4.
"Emotional intelligence facilitates fruitful interaction with others"

Not always.


True it does not guarantee

5.
Ok your five senses constitute the one source.


Good point. I did not look it from that angle…but very much true.

6.
Things, which are obviously driven by emotions, that do not make sense and may be harmful to them and to the society. So you can consider emotions a deficit.


Many thoughts that human have do not make sense and may be harmful to the society; does that mean that all thoughts that humans have should be considered deficits?

7.
For example, a good deed could be done due to being moved or due to moral laws. Once the good deed is done, what's the difference?


Intention behind the action is very important. It is a difference that the conscience understands.

8. Let me quote two sentences from a genetics article:
People who are culturally Deaf have a positive attitude toward being deaf. Typically, they do not wish to be treated or cured of their deafness and may feel threatened that genetic technology could reduce the numbers of deaf people being born.

Comments in the order of the sentences in bold.

1. How do you determine what you are or you should be concerned about? Emotions?
I am doing it mainly through rationale, but I never set boundaries, because, as for me, what you should be concerned about is determined by knowledge, morality and all the factors I mentioned.

If you are in room and it is cold, avoiding getting sick concerns you and the window has nothing to do with you.Besides if you open the window it will get colder. But there is a likelihood of the cold coming from the hole at the side of the window. I can give better examples.


2. Good for you that you are able to distinguish the beneficial from the non-beneficial knowledge. I am doing it mainly by checking if it complies with certain criteria but you cannot always be sure, because you may not have sufficient data.

Your statements are contradictory, because on the one hand you said that one does not need to understand things that do not concern him, and on the other hand you point to emotions as an extra source for receiving data implying that one, who does not have emotions, lacks an advantage, hence he should understand and acquire emotions.


3.

"Example. You feel sad. You look at the data in front of you and check for the factors that have in the past triggered this feeling in you. You don’t find any correlation with the present. You tap into the experience of those around you to make sure you haven’t missed anything. They don’t find anything either. The next logical step is go to the doctor. Doctor advices tests. Tests confirm that you have abnormally low levels of a vital neurotransmitter (important in many bodily/brain functions). You supplement through diet/medication. Problem resolved. Without the ‘sad’ emotion there was no problem, no understanding of something being wrong."

You actually did give advice by describing the way as to getting rid of the emotion of sadness. Otherwise, you would say something like "I believe that medication may solve some problems..." or "According to that, .....". Thank you for your suggestion, but it is a bad when you ignore data or facts regardless of the cause or the purpose. The struggle against every kind of ignorance, firstly your own, is of the same important to being a "good man".

4. Considering the five senses as a data source was an assumption. You are underestimating your senses by considering them one data source. I hope you never lose one of your senses, because you will see the difference in your life.

5. True, but is there any clear intention behind the actions driven by emotions or do we just have to say that anything driven by emotions is good just like we comment on the sunshine?


Nice chatting with you. To the best of my knowledge thoughts do not have emotions, do you have any?

you don't suffer physically. It's just a "thing." We are just as "normal" as anyone else. We are not ABNORMAL!

If you are missing a finger, are you still "normal?"

If you are missing a leg, are you still "normal?"

Even if you are blind, you are still "normal" just lack the eyesight.

Well, ok, if you want to split hairs, I guess I draw the line at Down's Syndrome, that is not normal.

Alexithymia is annoying because people don't "get" you....... You just don't react they way others would.

Ok, I'm confusing myself.

The definition of alexithymia cleary states that people having alexithymia suffer from physical symptoms.

"Alexithymia is annoying because people don't "get" you....... You just don't react they way others would"

This is too vague just like:

Me: Where are you?
You: In the sea.
Me: Where exactly?
You: Near the blue spot.

Thank you for your answers. I am 100% sure that I do not have alexithymia.

Dear ABD, using your comment numbering 1-5
---------------

1&2.How do you determine what you are or you should be concerned about?
or how to distinguish between beneficial and non-benefial knowledge?
Well, just as you put it:
… mainly by checking if it complies with certain criteria ….
ex. gossip does not concern me but the hole at the side of the window letting in the cold air does.
---------------

2&4. …..implying that one, who does not have emotions, lacks an advantage, hence he should understand and acquire emotions.
Yes in certain context. Just as you stated:
I hope you never lose one of your senses, because you will see the difference in your life.
Well ABC, the same also holds true regarding the sense of emotions.
---------------

3. We are still in disagreement regarding what was stated in the original example. Yet you have partly stated my conclusion: …it is a bad when you ignore data or facts regardless of the cause or the purpose.
If you would add to your sentence: “regardless of the source”. It is bad when you ignore data or facts simply because Emotion is the source. I would suggest integration of data from different sources to come to a more comprehensive analysis.
---------------

3.The struggle against every kind of ignorance, firstly your own, is of the same important to being a "good man".
Beautifully put…agree.
---------------

5.is there any clear intention behind the actions driven by emotions or do we just have to say that anything driven by emotions is good just like we comment on the sunshine?
not every action driven by emotion can be good. Actually seems immoral to base intention on whims of the emotions.
---------------

Yes, it has been a fruitful discussion. Maybe too many variables being discussed simultaneuously, would be easier to to discuss one variable at time....then again we are not discussing mathematics.
---------------

Dear DXS,

the issue with discussing "normal" vs "abnormal" is the following:
that which is "similar" to the "control group" is called "normal" and that which is different is called "abnormal". What are we comparing against? if you are investigating number of fingers and your "control group" has 10 fingers than those who have 11 or 9 fingers would be defined as abnormal.

ex. gossip does not concern me but the hole at the side of the window letting in the cold air does.

The definition of gossip: "conversation or reports about other people's private lives that might be unkind, disapproving, or not true"

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/gossip

Gossip is a source of information, which is often malicious and should not be of interest. However, two parameters such as the truth (of the information) and the person committing gossip, makes it a source of information that should be taken into account. Conversations or reports are sometimes characterized as gossip to underestimate their importance and their true motivation. Imagine (if you are able to) that you are informed that disapproving and unkind reports have taken place concerning one of your highest priorities directly related to the priority. This person happens to be the most majestic female ever lived according to specified criteria.
If you ignore the information you will be totally blind, because on the one hand every parameter related to your priorities is important (and ignoring data is against the principle of obtaining knowledge) and on the other hand refusing to interact with such a person does not conform to the methodology of self-improvement (In particular, obtaining useful things from gifted people).
So it is not black or white, when trivial things meet important factors.

If you would add to your sentence: “regardless of the source”.

Besides you said so.

As I initially stated I believe that I do not have emotions, in particular at a percentage of 75-85%.

I will describe a thought of mine as an example for what I mean regardless of source. This might sound paranoid, but it is not. Besides my thoughts discussing with thoughts is not more normal. This might also be against my not having alexithymia, because it sounds like alexithymia, but it is not.

I was trying to figure out what a person thinks of me or what she feels. I was not able to be sure more than 60% based on the available data. Today, I saw a objectively lovely little female dog in a car looking at me and trembling. I also knew that the dog was sick. I said that the dog is trembling due to the car windows being open and cold coming through the window. Others said that the dog might be scared due to the way it was looking at human beings. I remember living the same scene a few day ago seeing the person in a car looking at me with the same way and having the right window open. Of course I could not figure out if she was trembling.

As a result, I think (at a 95% percentage of righteousness due to evidence and trusting my senses) that she is frightened of me. Of course this was not my purpose, but inversely, I wanted her at least to (if she does not trust me) be comfortable with me. The others told me not to look at the dog. I cannot do the same with her.

This is a oversimplistic example of sources and understanding. There are others at least 10 times more complex leading to nowhere. Another reason, I'd better leave emotions outside.

I would suggest integration of data from different sources to come to a more comprehensive analysis.

On principle I agree, but "more comprehensive analysis" is too vague, a more accurate method or control technique should be more appropriate. which is also quite vague.

Yes, it has been a fruitful discussion. Maybe too many variables being discussed simultaneuously, would be easier to to discuss one variable at time....then again we are not discussing mathematics.

So what are we discussing?

So it is not black or white, when trivial things meet important factors.
I’m quite black and white in this aspect… right is right and wrong is wrong. I try my best to avoid the grey. I find that In the long run it also makes life easier.

Your example doesn’t sound alexithymic or paranoid (non-professional opinion, of course). However, awareness could make you feel more comfortable in such settings.
Every society has its own sets of norms/culture. Codes of what is considered normal, if you deviate from these it’s considered abnormal behaviour. Depending on the deviation, deviants may be considered anything from odd to annoying to threatening.
If this lady truly was threatened by you then it probably was due to one of the two: 1) factors due to you or 2) factors not due to you. Examples given below correlating with 1) and 2) (Note examples are not intended as advice/suggestion, and with no intent to offend):
1) Factors due to you. Did you deviate in any way that it is considered threatening in your society? Perhaps where you live people associate tattoos (or whatever) with criminals. If you showed tattoos (or whatever) then the lady might have felt threatened by you due to presumed association with criminality. OR It could be that in the society where you live, you’re skin colour or religion or ethnicity is considered to be cause of threat.
2) Factors not due to you. It has to do with Her personal life story. You are the spitting image of that decent/friendly-looking person who unexpectedly died /abused her so badly. Her memories cause her to be alerted and feel threatened by you. OR it is a person with some other problems.

So even if it has to do with you it might not necessarily be your fault. You can potentially do much more if she felt threatened due to 1), because 2) is too random. Yet with awareness, you can feel more comfortable and proactively work for a better society, a better future for yourself.

So what are we discussing?
??? A question someone just entering into an unknown discussion would ask.

I’m quite black and white in this aspect… right is right and wrong is wrong. I try my best to avoid the grey. I find that In the long run it also makes life easier.

Following moral laws, principles and legality, yes. But it happens that ignorant, immoral, illegal and having low skills people show off arrogance by being categorical on a regular basis. So one should take care of not doing that mistake, because he will fall in the group of rubbish, deviating from the uprightness.

Every society has its own sets of norms/culture. Codes of what is considered normal, if you deviate from these it’s considered abnormal behaviour. Depending on the deviation, deviants may be considered anything from odd to annoying to threatening.

You describe informal rules conditioning ghettos(criminal societies) and feudalism(societies of the illegal and the immoral). These should be smashed, because they deviate from the moral laws, legality and justice. Decent societies conform at least a percentage of 60% to the combination of principles and laws. I do not think that small Vaticans being ruled by rubbish and arrogant little Popes promote the equality and the progress.

Did you deviate in any way that it is considered threatening in your society? Perhaps where you live people associate tattoos (or whatever) with criminals. If you showed tattoos (or whatever) then the lady might have felt threatened by you due to presumed association with criminality. OR It could be that in the society where you live, you’re skin colour or religion or ethnicity is considered to be cause of threat.

According to the above, no. I am not neither a criminal nor an extreme kind of person. Besides I avoid wandering in regions of criminals without a reason, and I avoid any kind of discrimination due to righteousness, plus any kind of racists.

It has to do with Her personal life story. You are the spitting image of that decent/friendly-looking person who unexpectedly died /abused her so badly. Her memories cause her to be alerted and feel threatened by you. OR it is a person with some other problems.

The first assumption makes some sense (40%), because I have some data, insufficient though. And because I haven't died yet. Ok I spoke a few bad words but they were reactions due to the confusion she caused, in any case nobody can say that I abused her, she abused my intentions by means of actions. I also apologized to her twice and she did not respond.
In practical terms, apart from a slight persistence in stupidity, Her clothing not always being proper, her not always being honest and her unpredictability, which might be due to the reason above, in theoretical terms she is awesome at a 85% in every aspect. So if it is trauma experience, she should apply some high-pass filtering in memory retrieval, but if I explain it to her she will definitely not understand. Do you think she is emotional? Because if she is so, I thought of four ways to trigger her emotions to gain a hug from her and some power, such as appearing weak or emphasizing that she is important to me in terms of friendly relationship or understanding her or doing things in order for her to feel well without her awareness or all of them. I will also try to avoid the method so far not to scare her again.

I hope she won't be in the 15% mistake region.

??? A question someone just entering into an unknown discussion would ask.

Second thoughts usually know this answer.

Do you think she is emotional?....
Do not know her, cannot say.

---

....I thought of four ways to trigger her emotions to gain a hug from her and some power, such as appearing weak or emphasizing that she is important to me in terms of friendly relationship or understanding her or doing things in order for her to feel well without her awareness or all of them.


Dear Abc,

You seem to be willing to put in the effort.

Truthfulness is linked to righteousness. In truthfulness there might be short-term losses, but long-term gain.

Falsehood is linked to wickedness. In falsehood there might be short-term gains, but long-term loss.

False advertisement might get you that hug and some power = Short-term gain. What you want (I presume) is something lasting.

Instead of false advertisement, promote yourself honestly and with good conducts. It is only right she knows honestly what she is getting with you. Then let her choose.

I get the impression that you strive for righteousness + are willing to make an effort + are 75-85% unbiased by emotions = So to me, you seem up to the task.
---

Second thoughts usually know this answer.
;-D

Truthfulness is linked to righteousness. In truthfulness there might be short-term losses, but long-term gain.

Falsehood is linked to wickedness. In falsehood there might be short-term gains, but long-term loss.

False advertisement might get you that hug and some power = Short-term gain. What you want (I presume) is something lasting.

It holds true that truthfulness should be a fundamental principle for every act. It is not only a requirement for righteousness, but also a part of the puzzle. I consider false advertisement immoral, but one might say that the end is so moral that it justifies any slightly immoral but legal and fair or slightly illegal but moral and fair means. The purpose transcends any doubt about being 100% right at first glance, because it is a good purpose.

As for the short/long - term benefit rationale, I cannot decide, since I suppose it is like this:

If she looks at me with her glorious eyes, she makes my day. If she smiles with her perfect smile, she makes my week. If she hugs me with her slender arms, she makes my month. If she kisses me with her powerful lips, she makes my year. If she does all of these on a regular bases, she makes my whole life or beyond this prediction. So who does not want limitless power, some kind of immortality? One who has doubts about committing greed.

Besides I cannot examine this issue on a benefit basis, because being self-seeker is generally immoral and does not fit this case.

Hence if the dilemma was either temporary or everlasting power from her, I would say I want both of them.

Instead of false advertisement, promote yourself honestly and with good conducts. It is only right she knows honestly what she is getting with you. Then let her choose.

I actually haven't lied to or about her. As I have done the proper self-criticism and I drew the conclusion that I repent being angry with her or overreacting, but she acted weirdly or immorally and she despised my intentions. So she cannot say that I am not honest.
Indeed freedom of choice dictates that she is free to choose, even if the odds are obviously against me.

I get the impression that you strive for righteousness + are willing to make an effort + are 75-85% unbiased by emotions = So to me, you seem up to the task.

Thank you for being encouraging. Righteousness is the compass and my will stronger than an obsession. I also do not suffer from emotions. But without saying that it is not worth the risk or giving it a try, the concept turns to be unpredictable or greedy. It also triggers my anxiety, I am already sighing and trying to find a reason to avoid it without success.

Abc, this post was different from your previous ones.

Love of something can make a person blind or deaf.

I wrote like 1000 words and they disappeared. Yes, I honestly love her in my way.

If she looks at me with her glorious eyes, she makes my day. If she smiles with her perfect smile, she makes my week. If she hugs me with her slender arms, she makes my month. If she kisses me with her powerful lips, she makes my year. If she does all of these on a regular bases, she makes my whole life or beyond this prediction. So who does not want limitless power, some kind of immortality? One who has doubts about committing greed.

that sounds like emotion to me.... kinda like a crush. if you keep it in perspective and don't let it rule your world, it could bring pleasure.

that sounds like emotion to me.... kinda like a crush. if you keep it in perspective and don't let it rule your world, it could bring pleasure.

Among other facts, I wrote that thoughts describes love such as an illness and I am already getting sick. I haven't seen her for months. Please do not draw arbitrary conclusions and oversimplify things, because you haven't read the 1000 words. Trying to face the issue from a practical perspective...

...I feel nothing about her, I love her, I want her to like me and hug me as soon as possible?

We all want to be understood and appreciated. That's what love is. It's understanding and appreciation. It's not an illness. The illness comes from an absence of love.

Dear Abc,

First of all, please allow me to highlight key points from this thread. You named this thread: ”Emotional Blindness”. Here “Emotional Blindness” was discussed from both perspectives:
1. Blindness to emotions
2. Blindness due to emotions

(Personally I do not advocate blindness)
Among several variables, we discussed the importance of all the senses (the five senses + sense of emotion) and the consequences of losing a sense; We also discussed emotion’s role and taking logical decisions; We found several common grounds one of which is the importance of adhering to moral values/principles (righteousness, importance of intentions, etc. ), etc.

Now fast-forward to when I read your post from 2016-09-11.

I cannot look into your heart, however, your words gave resemblance to love. Yet awareness/acknowledgement was not stated, however, you did say: …I also do not suffer from emotions…

hmmmm.....Love = emotion

Bringing it to your attention should (logically) yield one of the two types of responses:
1. No, you are wrong. What you mistakenly took as love is in fact…..
2. Yes, true (and potentially asking advice).

In your post you said:
Righteousness is the compass and my will stronger than an obsession. I also do not suffer from emotions.
A compass shows four cardinal points: north, south, east and west. The cardinal points are constant, whereas Right/Left are relative directions and differ depending on your location/direction. When emotions, or people, give directions (or advice) usually it will be given as right or left. You have to use the moral compass to self-determine whether those directions align with morals. A broken compass is of no help. A functioning compass that you cannot see (use) is of no help. Also when there is no acceptance of having an emotion, then probably no precausions will be taken to 'not be blinded by it'.

In the same post you also wrote:
I consider false advertisement immoral, but one might say that the end is so moral that it justifies any slightly immoral but legal and fair or slightly illegal but moral and fair means. The purpose transcends any doubt about being 100% right at first glance, because it is a good purpose.
This ‘end justifies the means’-approach in combination with obsession? This prompts the question: Would you listen to your conscience/reasoning when it told you that which you do not desire to hear?

So in response to your post I wrote:
Love of something can make a person blind or deaf.
Dear Abc, you chose to take these words as description of love... are there other ways to take these words? Please ponder more on the words.

I am fed up with this stupid forum. Again the send button did not work. Fate does not want to come to a conclusion.

The illegal and the immoral is deaf, I am not.

No conscience creates everything according to the mix of principles and laws and the aim is similar to the causes.

Again, you are mistaken because neither I have any feelings nor I am psychotic. I just loved her based on reasonable facts and estimated.

The thing is that I considered her a godlike gifted princess and that mean and arrogant anorexic bitch does not even speak with me despising everything.

Vanity of vanities all is vanity, one thought dies after another.

But there is always company, the majority of them fully agrees with me, even if you do not.

Let her go. Besides she might cause me emotions, as you said, leading me to blindness and deafness.

When you self-critique do you just take a few minutes and then come to the conclusion that you are not mistaken? Surely not. Please take the time to understand and digest what I’ve written (even those posts that go against your convictions) before coming to a conclusion.

If personal stories bore you, skip this section and read the last paragraph.
As a little girl I was walking to school one morning. I was all caught up in my mind when one thought made me laugh-out-loud. Then I heard this man’s voice directed at me. I looked at him: he was picking up trash and had a uniform that indicated that he was government-employed cleaner. He kept laughing and said something like “so you think it is funny that I am a cleaner. OK laugh. Go on, laugh…its funny, huh? But one day…but one day (I presume he meant karma would get me)”. I was being falsely accused of looking down on someone and mocking them due to the nature of their occupation. I desperately tried to explain that my laughing didn’t have anything to do with him. But he kept on picking the trash and laughing. I didn’t apologize because in all honesty I didn’t do anything wrong. But even as I left the scene I felt that perhaps I should have said I’m sorry (but not apologetic) for his hurt…because genuinely I was (and am) sorry for his hurt. However, I have learned from that experiance.

Dear Abc, my posts are simply in response to facts presented under Abc’s post….they have nothing to do with you personally… I don’t even know you. However, I am sorry (but not apologetic) for your hurt. Take care and have a happy, healthy and successful life.

I said it so many times (also in the posts that were not posted ), I am not deaf, I am not arrogant, I am not immoral, I am not prejudiced, I am not a self-seeker etc like the illegal and the immoral. I aim at legal goals similar to the seven virtues.

I appreciate and understand your statements. Thus, I love you. Your discussing with me means that you appreciate my statements, but it seems that you do not understand me. She neither appreciates me but she understands me. Does this mean that she hates me?

Thank you for your wishes. Best wishes to you as well.


As a little girl I was walking to school one morning. I was all caught up in my mind when one thought made me laugh-out-loud. Then I heard this man’s voice directed at me. I looked at him: he was picking up trash and had a uniform that indicated that he was government-employed cleaner. He kept laughing and said something like “so you think it is funny that I am a cleaner. OK laugh. Go on, laugh…its funny, huh? But one day…but one day (I presume he meant karma would get me)”. I was being falsely accused of looking down on someone and mocking them due to the nature of their occupation. I desperately tried to explain that my laughing didn’t have anything to do with him. But he kept on picking the trash and laughing. I didn’t apologize because in all honesty I didn’t do anything wrong. But even as I left the scene I felt that perhaps I should have said I’m sorry (but not apologetic) for his hurt…because genuinely I was (and am) sorry for his hurt. However, I have learned from that experiance.

Cleaning off the rubbish is a great work, so literally as allegorically. She is not only looking down on me, but as despises me due to lowest instincts, because there is no grounded reasoning for her behaving in such a way.
I neither want her apology nor anything similar to her "recognizing her mistakes". I forgive her if my forgiving her was so important to her. But it is not.

I also said that I like her eyes and her smile.
For God's sake I want her to hug me or I will hug her violently, because the way she treats me is unfair.

The conclusions about her being frightened was right, but it does not justify her behavior. She does not care about me. She despises me. She shows off her lowest instincts to me. She does them consciously and on purpose. Her reasoning, which I assume as she does not speak with me, is hilarious. And all this because my will is to stand up in love with her, of course not fall. This in combination with other factors is so unfair and illegal.

You see that the logical ambivalence of mine is due to her. So I'd better let her go or I'll lose control some day and bite her neck.

I give her flowers?

Two different kinds of my thoughts suggested that such an action increases the likelihood of my getting closer to the goal of the hug. What do you think?

For someone who claims to have no emotions this thread is beginning to resemble a Mills & Boons novel, filled with unrequited love, badly written, self obsessed and boring.

Abc loved Xyz.
Xyz was beautiful but she had an inferiority complex. Unknowingly Abc triggered that complex in her and exposed her to the pain/shame that came along with it. She got the impression that Abc did it deliberately and viewed him as unfairly judgmental towards her.
Abc was very attracted to Xyz and wanted her to like him and hug him. But he didn’t know how to make her understand that. He tried but his behavior seemed suspicious. Xyz saw this suspicious behavior as potentially being ‘up to no good’. So she tried to caution Abc but caused confusion instead. Abc thought she behaved weirdly or immorally and responded in anger by using words that were less than good. Xyz heard judgment in those words which she despised. She felt sick by it all and wanted nothing to do with it. Abc also got upset because he felt his intentions were misinterpreted. Like Xyz, he too felt that he was mistreated and judged unfairly.
Abc wanted to put the misunderstandings behind him and get close to her. He apologized to Xyz twice. But he didn’t show her any sincere attempt to resolve or understand that which had occurred between them, hence he unwantedly gave Xyz the impression that he just desired to get close to her without any understanding or concern for her. Thus, the misunderstandings got further confirmed rather than getting cleared-up; so Xyz gave no response to his apologies.



NOTE: I’m very black and white, in our conversations please don’t use violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases.

For someone who claims to have no emotions this thread is beginning to resemble a Mills & Boons novel, filled with unrequited love, badly written, self obsessed and boring.

I do not really know this novel or this kind of novels, but you are free not to buy it. Freedom of speech and freedom of choice.

Abc loved Xyz.
Xyz was beautiful but she had an inferiority complex. Unknowingly Abc triggered that complex in her and exposed her to the pain/shame that came along with it. She got the impression that Abc did it deliberately and viewed him as unfairly judgmental towards her.
Abc was very attracted to Xyz and wanted her to like him and hug him. But he didn’t know how to make her understand that. He tried but his behavior seemed suspicious. Xyz saw this suspicious behavior as potentially being ‘up to no good’. So she tried to caution Abc but caused confusion instead. Abc thought she behaved weirdly or immorally and responded in anger by using words that were less than good. Xyz heard judgment in those words which she despised. She felt sick by it all and wanted nothing to do with it. Abc also got upset because he felt his intentions were misinterpreted. Like Xyz, he too felt that he was mistreated and judged unfairly.
Abc wanted to put the misunderstandings behind him and get close to her. He apologized to Xyz twice. But he didn’t show her any sincere attempt to resolve or understand that which had occurred between them, hence he unwantedly gave Xyz the impression that he just desired to get close to her without any understanding or concern for her. Thus, the misunderstandings got further confirmed rather than getting cleared-up; so Xyz gave no response to his apologies.



NOTE: I’m very black and white, in our conversations please don’t use violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases.

Sincere:
(of a person, feelings, or behaviour) not pretending or lying; honest:
a sincere apology.
http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/sincere

So being sincere means telling what the person wants to hear or saying the absolute truth?

Because if it is the first, it means that the person conceals deceitful intentions or is deaf/blind or immoral (arrogant and blasphemous). I did not lie to her and I did my best to chat with her. She did not respond.

If she has inferiority complexes, then it is worse that she avoids discussion, as this is a characteristic of the rubbish.

But her appearance does not imply that she has inferiority complexes.

Assuming that I am not right, what is considered a sincere approach and what how can I be sure that she has inferiority complexes?

The idea of her being weak in her perfection (inferiority complexes) forces me to hug her in a violent way (do not misunderstand my words, I will just hug her without her wanting it with all her heart, not offending her), because it is a moral obligation to support the weak.

Plus, the idea of her considering me a liar forces me to make it as clear as possible that my intention is good, because it is a moral rule not to close your eyes to unfairness.

So thoughts I will take the risk and follow your suggestion in combination with my thoughts creating my relevant will. I will make things up, I will honestly understand her, I will decently hug her, I will be her true friend, I will transcend everything and I will write the gospel of her soul, because this would a part of the self-improvement process, it is a legal instruction to show kindness, she is gorgeous and because I have to eliminate the logical problems she causes to me.

Does this sound threatening, thoughts? Please do not be offensive by misinterpreting my will and my thoughts, because during our conversation you are drawing arbitrary conclusions all the time, while I decently listen to your opinions. Either you like it or not, I love you as it is also a moral obligation.

You won't impose your stupid point of black or white view on me justified by nonsense or a kind of deficit of yours. If you do not like our conversation, you can anytime abandon the conversation ship, despite the fact I respect our conversation by keeping on stating arguments.

What I wrote was:
….. he didn’t show … any sincere attempt to….
Not
….. he didn’t make … any sincere attempt to….
Can you look into her heart and mind? No. Then why is she supposed to be able to look into yours?

Exercise 1.

From your window: You see a man and a women walking together up to a gate.
1. What are their intentions?
2. How can you tell their intentions? What do you need to be able to tell their intentions?

Abc, intentions have three components: heart/mind, words and action.

Now let’s get back to you.

Exercise 2.

1. Do you have any holy authority that makes anybody who mistrusts your intentions the devil himself?
2. How can someone guess your intentions (no matter how noble)?
3. Should you at least try to get your intentions across to concerned parties? How can you get them across?
4. How can you save your intentions from being misinterpreted? Even when you will actively try to reveal your intentions then at times you will notice that people misinterpret or mistrust them. Why? Because we are humans. Thoughts can at times be deceived by the senses (For instance, optical illusions, mishear something, emotional or moral blindness/deafness, etc).

Answer these questions on your own and then re-read previous posts. I am leaving this thread but still wish you well.

I am and have always been a very shy person. However, I always make an effort to reach out to people of morals and good conduct; those who are fair-minded and strive for righteousness; regardless of what religion they associate themselves to. That is why I answered your thread.

PS.I requested:
…please don’t use violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases.
Neither you understood my request, my statements nor much anything else that I wrote. Wait didn’t you say:
…I appreciate and understand your statements. Thus, I love you.
Since you neither appreciated nor understood my statements so it means today your love has vanished. No wait, you changed your mind:
…Either you like it or not, I love you as it is also a moral obligation.
Ok, so today there is no prerequisite of understanding/appreciation. So basically that feeling has to do nothing with me, it is just a random fact.

Though not a Christian, in my faith we also believe in the messages derived from the Ten Commandments, including ‘love your neighbor’. Yet for me, those three words have special value; I’ve never uttered them to anyone else but my family. For you it seems to be a blanket statement. Wonder whether you are randomly saying it to other people as well? Or you are in particular imposing them on me who has specifically requested against it?

What I wrote was:
….. he didn’t show … any sincere attempt to….

Not
….. he didn’t make … any sincere attempt to…

Can you look into her heart and mind? No. Then why is she supposed to be able to look into yours?

I suppose righteousness dictates not being a showman, but a honest man, who makes honest attempts.

As I also said, I invite her to a conversation, since I am a blind and deaf human being (according to your point of view) and not the emotional magician who can find what is deep inside her heart.

Exercise 1.

From your window: You see a man and a women walking together up to a gate.
1. What are their intentions?
2. How can you tell their intentions? What do you need to be able to tell their intentions?

Abc, intentions have three components: heart/mind, words and action.

1. I do not know if I cannot recognize them.
2. I can ask them or watch their actions. Do not ask me to answer such a question, it is so vague and meaningless. It depends on hundreds of parameters.

Ok I agree at a 60%, because so the relationship among them as the consistency reveal the intentions. So what?

Now let’s get back to you.

Exercise 2.

1. Do you have any holy authority that makes anybody who mistrusts your intentions the devil himself?
2. How can someone guess your intentions (no matter how noble)?
3. Should you at least try to get your intentions across to concerned parties? How can you get them across?
4. How can you save your intentions from being misinterpreted? Even when you will actively try to reveal your intentions then at times you will notice that people misinterpret or mistrust them. Why? Because we are humans. Thoughts can at times be deceived by the senses (For instance, optical illusions, mishear something, emotional or moral blindness/deafness, etc).

Answer these questions on your own and then re-read previous posts. I am leaving this thread but still wish you well.

1. I believe you are quite inconsistent. Aren't you very black and white or do not you think you must be very black and white when it comes to the moral, to the legal and to the fair aspect of an issue? And do you have any particular privilege to mock people and draw arbitrary conclusions just like you deliberately did with the garbage man?

2. Conversation is a decent step, is it the fourth time I am writing it? Are you blind?

3. Answered. I am not a preacher or the Messiah.

4. Except for being emotionally blind, am I morally blind and deaf as well? See answer 1 and 2. 50% true, but being very black and white and avoiding discussion like you, it is not so reasonable and decent. Please re-read previous posts.

I am and have always been a very shy person. However, I always make an effort to reach out to people of morals and good conduct; those who are fair-minded and strive for righteousness; regardless of what religion they associate themselves to. That is why I answered your thread.

Good for you.

PS.I requested:
…please don’t use violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases.

Neither you understood my request, my statements nor much anything else that I wrote. Wait didn’t you say:
…I appreciate and understand your statements. Thus, I love you.

Since you neither appreciated nor understood my statements so it means today your love has vanished. No wait, you changed your mind:
…Either you like it or not, I love you as it is also a moral obligation.

This is because you may be a genius and I am a ordinary man. Although you are incoherent in your last message, I do appreciate and understand your statements and due to it being a moral obligation, it is true that I love you.

Ok, so today there is no prerequisite of understanding/appreciation. So basically that feeling has to do nothing with me, it is just a random fact.

This does not make sense at all.

Though not a Christian, in my faith we also believe in the messages derived from the Ten Commandments, including ‘love your neighbor’. Yet for me, those three words have special value; I’ve never uttered them to anyone else but my family. For you it seems to be a blanket statement. Wonder whether you are randomly saying it to other people as well? Or you are in particular imposing them on me who has specifically requested against it?

Freedom of speech, freedom of choice.

Leaving a discussion due to being offended by "I love you", it is like not drinking water due to my offering a glass of water to you. I won't agree to your wish for a paradoxical kind of respect, but I respect you, because I love you.

So yes, I will take the risk.

soooo many misunderstandings particularly in the last few posts. I got it!
Yes, I did make assumptions and drew arbitrary conclusions - I apologize. I have a guilty conscience and hope you will forgive me where I’ve wronged you. I would like to resolve the misunderstandings by sharing my thoughts on where I went wrong:

A. I assumed since you named the thread ‘emotional blindness’ you were emotionally blind. I also assumed that since I answered your thread and have the nickname ‘thoughts’ you knew that I was emotionally blind or at least emotionally weak-sighted. Therefore, I addressed the thread the way I did. I took it as a physically blind person asking another physically blind person: “what’s wrong with not being able to see? What’s the big deal with sight? Up until now I’ve done just fine in life without seeing so why do I need it? Doesn’t seeing cause all types of problems, like getting influenced by media’s unhealthy body-image and developing anorexia type of things?”

B. I assumed that from my posts it was clear that I do not consider you morally blind or deaf. I think this assumption of mine caused many break-downs in communication. I strive for righteousness but make mistakes along the way and sometimes I need someone to point it out for me. I would want someone to alert me if they saw me threading on love’s way and caution me regarding the possibility of love clouding reason (which can lead to all kinds of mistakes). Therefore, I assumed you too would appreciate if someone alerted you. I actually went beyond to meddling in your business, and talking about issues I have no knowledge of, and about what does not concern me = in all ways very wrong of me.

C. I assumed you have the same type of problems as me in relationship with others; problems that I probably have as a consequence of emotional weak-sightedness. The reoccurring problem is that I try and make an honest attempt with sincere intentions on something that is good but sometimes people misunderstand. For instance, writing on this thread, my intentions were good but … hmmm you know the rest. Now I am writing this to show you that my true intentions were never to hurt you; I did not deliberately do so. Yet I drew arbitrary conclusions, made mistakes and caused this confusion. I hope I have managed in showing my true intentions and perhaps cleared (at least a few) misunderstandings.

D. I also assumed if you understood that I am uncomfortable with “violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases” you would respect that by excluding such from our future conversations. However, I understand what you are saying…this is your thread and if I don’t like it then I should leave. I don’t like it so I will leave but I just wanted to clear up the misunderstandings and apologise first.

Perhaps in a way you got your answer on emotional blindness. At least now you know first-hand what type of misunderstandings can take place when one engages with an emotionally weak-sighted person (like me). I believe that not all I said was non-sense, there were some pearls of wisdom in there as well… please don’t brush those on the side :-).

soooo many misunderstandings particularly in the last few posts. I got it!
Yes, I did make assumptions and drew arbitrary conclusions - I apologize. I have a guilty conscience and hope you will forgive me where I’ve wronged you. I would like to resolve the misunderstandings by sharing my thoughts on where I went wrong:

A. I assumed since you named the thread ‘emotional blindness’ you were emotionally blind. I also assumed that since I answered your thread and have the nickname ‘thoughts’ you knew that I was emotionally blind or at least emotionally weak-sighted. Therefore, I addressed the thread the way I did. I took it as a physically blind person asking another physically blind person: “what’s wrong with not being able to see? What’s the big deal with sight? Up until now I’ve done just fine in life without seeing so why do I need it? Doesn’t seeing cause all types of problems, like getting influenced by media’s unhealthy body-image and developing anorexia type of things?”

B. I assumed that from my posts it was clear that I do not consider you morally blind or deaf. I think this assumption of mine caused many break-downs in communication. I strive for righteousness but make mistakes along the way and sometimes I need someone to point it out for me. I would want someone to alert me if they saw me threading on love’s way and caution me regarding the possibility of love clouding reason (which can lead to all kinds of mistakes). Therefore, I assumed you too would appreciate if someone alerted you. I actually went beyond to meddling in your business, and talking about issues I have no knowledge of, and about what does not concern me = in all ways very wrong of me.

C. I assumed you have the same type of problems as me in relationship with others; problems that I probably have as a consequence of emotional weak-sightedness. The reoccurring problem is that I try and make an honest attempt with sincere intentions on something that is good but sometimes people misunderstand. For instance, writing on this thread, my intentions were good but … hmmm you know the rest. Now I am writing this to show you that my true intentions were never to hurt you; I did not deliberately do so. Yet I drew arbitrary conclusions, made mistakes and caused this confusion. I hope I have managed in showing my true intentions and perhaps cleared (at least a few) misunderstandings.

D. I also assumed if you understood that I am uncomfortable with “violent/abusive language/descriptions or ‘I love you’-type phrases” you would respect that by excluding such from our future conversations. However, I understand what you are saying…this is your thread and if I don’t like it then I should leave. I don’t like it so I will leave but I just wanted to clear up the misunderstandings and apologize first.

Perhaps in a way you got your answer on emotional blindness. At least now you know first-hand what type of misunderstandings can take place when one engages with an emotionally weak-sighted person (like me). I believe that not all I said was non-sense, there were some pearls of wisdom in there as well… please don’t brush those on the side :-).

Since I pay a lot of attention to what you are saying and since I respect your will to resolve any misunderstandings, I take your assumptions and thoughts as given and definitely honest and grounded.

Because you admit to your hurting me, which I was not aware of, and because you said intentions are connected with actions.

Because I asked you if you were emotional and you did not respond. Because you unfairly imply that I claimed that all you said was nonsense. Because you unacceptably implied that I do not respect your religion.

Because you are conducting a superficial self-criticism, leaving and believe that everything is fixed just like you did with the garbage man. Because you will do it again and again.

Because you have been illegal committing sins according to Law of God. Because you might be burnt in hell according to many religions, as these sins might play a significant role on the judgement day.

Because this is not my thread as this is not my forum. Because I do not have emotions and I do not need your apology. Because you on the one hand urge to take into account your statements and on the other hand you decided to leave, depriving me of the right ask for clarifications in case I have further questions and deliberately leading me to fallacy.

Because on principle I believe in good faith.

You should hug me and ask me to kiss you, since this way you will in practice prove that your intentions were good, as accepting hugging and kissing is generally acceptable method for practically revealing good intentions. Then you should clearly state if you wish to leave or not, as according to your statement you are accusing me of urging you to leave and I never urged you to leave, I did it to Jute, because he/she claimed that he/she was getting bored and my purpose was not to get Jute bored.

Because you also implied numerous bad and offensive things about me, like I am a suspicious and hypocrite person, and because of all of the above, you should approve of my hugging and kissing you on demand, except for occasions you should clearly state at least two days before my relevant request to you. You will also be in time aware of the schedule, so there will be no excuses for misunderstandings.

You were the preacher during our conversation and when you were to face the proper criticism, you abandoned the conversation. You are arrogant and ignorant, since you believe you are something special. This is proved by your absurd reaction to my loving you and to your inability to support your own statements. This is not righteousness, this is inconsistency or pretending, which means that your intentions are from leniently ungrounded to deliberately deceitful.

So either keep on being inconsistent or keep your disturbed emotional conscience shut, since silence is gold.

So, you're reduced to babbling away to yourself now. To quote your own post "Silence is golden," perhaps you should try practicing it. When you've got nothing worth saying, say nothing. This is a forum about Alexithymia it is not a an agony aunt column for lonely hearts.

So, you're reduced to babbling away to yourself now. To quote your own post "Silence is golden," perhaps you should try practicing it. When you've got nothing worth saying, say nothing. This is a forum about Alexithymia it is not a an agony aunt column for lonely hearts.

For someone who claims to have no emotions this thread is beginning to resemble a Mills & Boons novel, filled with unrequited love, badly written, self obsessed and boring.

You find my posts bad, boring and meaningless.
You quoted me two times.
You believe that you suffer from alexithymia, since you think this is an exclusively alexithymia forum.
You know that I won't follow your prompt because you urged me before and I kept on writing.

So lonely Jute, please go to bed.

You've quoted me more than twice. I don't "believe" that I have alexithymia, I do have it. I don't "think" this is an alexithymia forum, it is. Just look at it's name, it isn't St. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club, which you apparently think it is. I'm not lonely, you're the one with emotional problems, not me. I don't need your, or anyone else's advice on when to go to bed. I've nothing more to say to you. I wish the same could be said of you but I'm ready to bet that you're going to want to get the last words in, and then some more, and then some more, even though you've got absoluetly nothing of any consequence to say.

So why don't you just go to bed?

There is a sickness in your heart ! You are concocting lies !
I am celibate and have ALWAYS been celibate!
NEVER any hug or kiss outside immediate family (father, mother, sisters/brother)!
I NEVER met, talked or seen you! We NEVER hugged or kissed!
I NEVER LOVE YOU! I NEVER LUST YOU! I NEVER CLAIM LOVE OR LUST FOR YOU!
Regarding your confusion, talk to your therapist not to me!

There is a sickness in your heart ! You are concocting lies !
I am celibate and have ALWAYS been celibate!
NEVER any hug or kiss outside immediate family (father, mother, sisters/brother)!
I NEVER met, talked or seen you! We NEVER hugged or kissed!
I NEVER LOVE YOU! I NEVER LUST YOU! I NEVER CLAIM LOVE OR LUST FOR YOU!
Regarding your confusion, talk to your therapist not to me!

and illegally blaming me for things existing only in your disturbed by emotions imagination, you delusional paranoid freak.

Doesn't your hilarious and paranoid phobia of love let you understand the meaning of a hypothetical question?

I claimed that I love you because it is a moral obligation. Hence love is the result and morality is the motivation. Because anything without a motivation is unreasonable and ungrounded just like your phobia, the same is love without motivation. Because you are unable to understand the moral motivation and the purpose must be fulfilled, some other kind of motivation should me employed, like the will of triggering some of your positive feelings or covering some of your deficits. Besides you seem to suffer from orgasm issues.

My therapist acts quite indifferently and weirdly, another therapist suggested that I follow a special treatment and at the same hospital another therapist considering himself an idol wrote down the prescription underestimating the issue and abruptly interrupted the meeting. His diagnosis was as wrong as the diagnosis of the second therapist, but the treatment he suggested must be more effective. And as I said my therapist believes that I am emotionally blind and suggested me that I buy some.

So, thank you for your interest in my coping with my issue, but go abuse yourself. I am done with the "emotional" search through this stupid forum.